Waking up to a conclusion that I’m in denial for everything in this moment, like God, good people, trust, happiness, Love, etc. Maybe when I pass this phase i can accept everything again..
Just leave me alone and maybe i will figure out something..
And those emotions that i give you all are fake, why should i give fake emotions? Its my life but why i always wanted to please everyone? I can’t said “No” to almost everything. I’m not a Puppet but it feels like i am a puppet. I can’t show any emotions that I want to show, like sadness, anger. Why i can’t be angry to someone? Why should i put my emotions away for the delight of other people? Why should i suffer to make them happy? Why can’t i say what i want to say? Why?
*and the list of unanswered questions continue in my head*
This deep thoughts that always running in my head and i can’t stop it. And this is just a small portion from what’s really inside of me.